I may be looking into these EFF people in a serious way... very soon. There is just so much hurry up and wait to get through first.
I am also considering the ACLU. Any other suggestions?

Did you know I own/operate/administer more than one website? In fact I own several, but actually actively run 2. Did you know my other (very active) site could also be considered inflammatory to certain people? Did you know the other site has readers and posters in an open forum format from all over the world? Were you aware many USAF people who have worked or shopped the BX in the past 4-5 years have at least heard of my site? I have remained the ever vigilant admin of that site as well... Hell, that site has lead to a few positive outcomes.

So- did you ask? These precious ammunition providers that gave you what you were looking for so you could keep your crazy bitch nurse and rid yourselves of my proverbial fleas... Did they even know what they were talking about? Did you know what they were talking about? Did you even bother to look up a url to verify the facts you may have to testify to?! Didn't care to ask because you had all you needed? There is a flaw in that kind of thinking.

Trust me, had I ever intended to come after you, your business or your precious appearances, you could expect a far more frontal attack, including names, dates, details, addresses, hell- even physical descriptions... Not the subtle, gagged and veiled vents I allowed here from my own sanity's sake. Hiding all names, details and identifying remarks, I made foggy references, generalized remarks and made funny of my stressful work-life. I called my boss a bitch- that's doesn't make me revolutionary. In fact, I think it just makes me like everyone else who thinks their job (or elements of it) sucks sometimes.

What sucks is that the VAST majority of the people who work under you... They do great things. They work hard and make you pompous asses look pious, and righteous and good. Too bad you are just managers- just like every other manager of any other business- you shovel the shit from both directions and have lost sight of the good intentions you started in the business with. You're common- predictable, and common... you could do so much more- but you stick with simple linear logic... and it may end up being my rainbows and butterflies for a change; no matter how much back peddling and double talking you do, it doesn't change the fact that you fucked up.

Night at work went okay- lots of running, but not so much that I was ready to pull my hair out in great clumps. Even got to bolt out 15 minutes early. Yay me.... until... I get a frantic phone call halfway home from my freaking out daughter that we need to take the dog to the hospital when I get home. Seems Dummy the Dog found a bottle of supplement pills that she took a liking to and started chewing the cap off of. Fucking yay?
"Did she eat any?" Don't know. "Are there pills scattered?" Yeah. "Are any broken?" I don't know. "Did you see her eat one?" She was licking one, but I don't know if she ate it. "Did you pick them UP?!" Not yet. "Is she acting weird?!" Not really. "You need to go pick them all up right now" Okay, Mom.
While I was asking rational questions of about situation, in my mind all I was thinking was "Shit, fuck, damn, shit, piss, fuck"..."Okay, sweetie, get her in her crate and keep an eye on her til I get home, in the mean time pick up any and all the pills you can find, even if they are broken." (Shit fuck damn piss fuck!)

Get home, google up inducing vomiting while finding the number to an emergency vet service. The Doc was very prompt in calling me back and reaffirmed my suspicion that induction of vomiting was the thing to do. Yipee skippy. Let's make a dog throw up. So, still in my work clothes and very sore feet, I run out the door to get hydrogen peroxide and a syringe. Not finding said syringe, I opted for the turkey baster and ran back home... and the thought of how joyful following the dog around the back yard watching her gag her guts up was just SO exciting. Not to mention the anticipation of actually squirting the shit down her throat and getting her to swallow it. What a treat it turned out to be- Filling a turkey baster full of peroxide, prying her mouth open and forcing the baster into her throat, then trying to squirt it before she wiggled away and spit it all out. I mean, I felt guilty doing it, but at the same time just wanted to get that part over with. The garage floor and lower half of my pants got splattered with hydrogen peroxide and slimy ass dog spit. More yay.

Followed her around the yard for about 45 minutes, as she went from normal playful dog to retching vomiting dog and back... It has now been 2 hours since I walked in the door, and she is done puking (I hope). Did I mention that I had to poke thru the dog vomit with a stick looking for pill fragments? It's just the way to spend a morning after a long night at work... Hell, everyone should try it. Now if I can just get the kid to calm down and convince her that the dog will be fine. Maybe if I repeat myself 12 or 13 more times she'll believe me...? At some point I hope to be able to get some sleep... and maybe not wake up to find more slimy nasty ass dog vomit on the floor. Fucking big sigh.

My co-workers are pretty awesome... It's like a team. It just works. People get along. They can be themselves and not worry about finding a knife in their back. I actually believe that my manager means it when she says "open door policy" and "call me anytime if you have a problem." It's fucking awesome.

I get home on time- as I am not kept there waiting on someone else to quit fucking around by looking busy and doing nothing. When I leave, I don't have to stress and worry about work at home... Not once have I had to think, "Oh my God, is so-and-so gonna be alright?" or "I wonder what day shift is gonna flip shit about to start this week's pissing contest". Did I mention that it's great? That I feel relieved every day when I go to work that I am not dreading walking in the door. Hell, I look forward to work.

Damn. Now I remember what this employment thing is supposed to be like. I guess it took me getting into something else to realize how broken my last employer is. From what I heard last, they are still broken. Good. Fuck em anyway. If ever there was a time to put faith in Karma, this might be it. I am sure if it goes around and comes around... well, there is a lot coming for those horrible people with their fucked up ideas and ambiguous way of running an establishment. I still worry for the people they care for, but there are plenty of good folks who work there... it just happens that the assholes are the ones in charge. Thankfully they aren't the ones who really do any of the real work of caring for the elderly people. They sit around and have meetings about how to dictate said cares, and pretend that so long as no one is bitching that it is all rainbows and butterflies. They haven't figured out yet that the standards they set by their behavior doesn't mean there isn't bitching to be done or problems to fix- it's just that the peons who work there (those are the good people), have given up saying shit about anything, because it either leads to the frustration of nothing being done, or a pink slip. See above reference: Fuck em- in the neck.

The only downside of the new job so far is my poor feet. It's tough being back on them for pretty much 8 hours straight, but it's just something I am gonna have to get used to... for the time being when I get home I find myself walking like I have a load in my pants- that is to say, very short slow strides with as little movement from the knees down as possible. Can anyone recommend a good "on my feet for hours on end" shoe? Mine suck some serious ass.

I finally told the admins (you remember, the ones who don't care?) about the horrible shit Nurse Crazy was up to over the last few months- I laid it all out for them. Two days later I was fired- for failure to report abuse. Yeah- it makes zero sense. If I hadn't reported it in the first place, I would have still been employed, but reporting it caused me to get fired for not reporting. Go ahead and re-read that- I'll wait.

Okay, so... I did mucho research on laws regarding whistle blowing and was pretty sure I got dry dicked with no reach around. Looking through endless pages of bullshit, I found a policy on their site about conflict resolution, so I called it. I told them the whole long tale- and at first I gave only my first name and an alternate phone number than the one my work had on file. I called again, and again, and again, and it was forwarded to a cheeky fellow who is in charge of some important shit 'round these parts. By that time, my name, the facility, etc was out so an investigation went on... and on... and on... Took about 2 weeks for them to come to their stellar decision.

They found that my termination was not in line with company policy. (No shit, it's also illegal, jackass.) So, they "amended" it to a write up. Awesomesauce- when can I go back? Wait, there's more. In the course of this investigation, one person mentioned this website to the admins, and they passed it on. Mr. Cheeky Fellow came here and saw that I called my nurse crazy, the admins assholes, etc. (Because I am a revolutionary in thinking my boss sucks, and no one has ever bitched about work before.) So, he decided to fire me again- for my blog. To recap, I got fired, rehired and re-fired. They somehow think that doesn't fall under the same action of retaliation.

Now, I imagine the conversation between Cheeky Fellow and the facility went something like "Well, you shouldn't have done that. It's illegal under whistleblower protection and it's called retaliation.". "Well, we don't care what we do to get rid of her... we'll find something." and sometime later, "One of the people here traced her to a website. Get her for that. Just don't let her back in here." and Mr. Cheeky called me with all of it.

Now, this blog... is my outlet, my steam valve, my therapy- recommended (and read) by my Psychiatrist in Germany. I have had it a very, very long time- coming up on 5 years now. As far as the people I bitch about- they are anonymous. No names. Not even close names. I never once mentioned where I work- not even the town I live in... unless there really is someplace called No-Fucking-Where, ND. I did notice my about me page says I still live in Ramstein. A Google search of every variation of my name produces between 1-2 million hits. Hell, you even have to dig to find personal pictures.

Although they nailed me with entries on the first page... They also seemed to take a bunch of shit out of context- like missing the repetitive parts about loving my job, loving what I do, and having nightmares about the Crazy Nurse and her stunts. PLUS this site would never have been found if it weren't for an investigation launched when they fucked up in the first place by firing me. So, it all seems a bit over the top.

I would post the names on here of everyone involved in this shit bomb- but tat seems wrong- like I would be stooping to their level. Not that it is beneath me, but I am doing what I usually do. When things get crazy around me, I sit very still and very quiet and watch, to figure out what my next move is. This week it is not only to find a new job, but deal with my new found experiences called "panic attacks"; never had them before, and they are not very convenient for my schedule. At some point I may go on ahead and smear all of their shit on the walls for everyone to see... but for now, I am trying to compartmentalize.

If you know recourse for whistle blowing, share. If you are just supporting me, and know intimate details of names, etc, please refrain from posting them- I hate editing feedback. I need to keep this as... cool as possible for the time being.

That is not to say that there aren't things I would like to accomplish... Like getting back to posting on here. Maybe if I just fucking force myself to sit down and write something- anything- everyday... Could get boring for anyone who might still stop by to read, but fuck it. In return, maybe those that stop by could leave a comment or two... OH- or maybe people who read could make a resolution to not make refuckingtarded comments...? I dunno. Anyway- Happy New Year.

About that ink. We bought the printer at Best Buy. We have one of those Best Buy cards, and therefore they have a detailed reconrd of every dollar we have spent there, and every item we have bought... including the printer model number. As I wasn't sure what model we had, and didn't want to purchase the wrong ink, I found a sales guy to look it up and find out what we needed. "Number 74". Okay. Great awesome. Grab the ink, drag the husband kicking and screaming from the store and head home.

I left the ink in the bag until today, casue I was gonna print my shit to sell last years costumes. Come to find out the little ass monkey who works at Best Buy can't fuckin read, as the ink cartridge doesn't fit. It is not even CLOSE. That guy IS fail. And yes I already opened it... and I am of the mind set that they will still take it back, as it was their asshole flunky who had me buy the wrong god damned thing. Of course by the time I get down there- 40 fucking miles down there- I will be good and pissed. I don't think I will be denied.

Well, despite them knowing this information... and despite the fact that he runs fucking circles around all of us put together- because he had to take some time off to care for his family, (who likely got sick from some shit he caught at work), they decided to arbitrarily punish him by taking 8 hours away from him a week.

He's pissed. I would be too. In fact I am- we come now to the fucktard part... They decided to hand those extra hours to me. I didn't want them. I didn't ask for them. In fact, I told them several times that working 5 days a week is hard on me and my family. So they are fucking him, and fucking me at the same time. I came back to a schedule that has me slotted for 9 of the first 12 days of the month... I know I am no math whiz, but that sounds like more than part time to me; hell it sounds like more than full time. Not to worry, it is conveniently split between the pay periods so the bastards don't have to pay me for overtime. Bunch-o-fucktards.

I had grand plans for projects here in the house when I got back, and they have had to be put on hold a bit. Not to worry, there is a girl who is desperate for hours, and she was more than happy to take a few days next week and later this month. In the mean time, I am doing my best the grit my teeth and get through these first 2 weeks of fall.

I am completely exhausted. The nightmares have become a constant part of any naps I take, so I have pretty much given them up. I find them somehow more tiring than just staying up.
On a more positive note, I went to the dermatologist last week and had a mole removed. Figured it was about time, before I had to register it for it's own zip code. 2 things- Getting three lidocaine shots in a very small area is somewhat painful. Secondly the most sickening smell EVER is that of your own burning flesh, especially when it is an area being cauterized right under your nose.

I had best shoot for some sleep. I get a whole night off before I have to go back for two more. Whatever will I DO with all this free time? Bunch of ASSHATS.

I have little to bitch about this week- as I have spent the last two and a half weeks on vacation in Arizona. Being away from the Crazy Munchhausen's having bitch nurse at work has been gleeful. There have been some low points, but overall, it's been pretty nice. I wish the hub could have come with me, missing him something awful.

Started out the trip in Phoenix. Well, Carefree actually. Spent a week with my paternal grandparents. His internet was equivocal to a couple of tin cans and a string, and had no wireless, so I wasn't able to hook up my system to it. That was major suck, as when we had downtime at the house, the kids were bored to tears... So, we went out doing stuff alot. That was fun- except that "doing stuff" tends to fucking hemorrhage money. Paying for everything sucked.
The kids got to go to the zoo, and saw a movie, and went out for some good lunches... They also got to learn some new words, like dialysis, canula, O2 concentrator, and renal failure, since my Grandfather is doing somewhat poorly these days. I mean, he looks good for what he's been through, but overall it was a little bit of a shock to see him so weak.

I am now down in Sierra Vista, AZ, hanging with mom. It is much cooler here, (by like 20 degrees), and she has a bit more for the kids to occupy themselves with during said downtime- including internet and a couple of computers... a big desert filled yard to play in, and a ginormous dog who loves kids, (they smell like cookies and dirt- a dog's favorite thing). They dig playing with mom and Rick- and they are constantly with them... and it's really nice. Not only that they are getting to know each other, but it gives me an emotional and physical break from chasing after them on a constant basis, chewing ass like a fucking machine.

So, that's my life this week. I fly home on Sunday- the kids go back to school, (YAY, WIN), and I go back to work, (BOO, FAIL). But as it is now autumn, and Kev is back at work, I can finally get back into a routine that allows me to keep up, (and catch up) with the house and such. Hopefully, I may even have time to keep up on here with writing, although I am not making any promises. There are bits and parts of the trip that require some venting, and maybe some picture posting.

In any case, that's where I've been. I would like to say that I'll be posting more often. I will certainly try, but seems I am in a funk right now. I will be putting up pictures of the most recent "Holy shit I feel old" day. Our daughter turned 9 on Saturday... and HOLY SHIT- Chuck E Cheese is a loud loud place. More on that later. Tchuss.

I will write a quick intro to Nurse Clown. She is the raggin ass bitch who comes on day shift. I swear to god, she walks so high on her aura of self righteousness it is actually amazing to watch- like a train wreck in slow motion. You can talk about people who think their shit don't stink, but this twat- she thinks her shit is perfect- maybe even miraculous. Her moral grandstanding attitude makes me wanna puke on her shoes. If there was one person I could take in the back and beat to a bloody stump and get away with it? It would be Nurse Clown... Yep, Nurse Crazy is a personal piss off... but bloodying Nurse Clown would be a greater service to all of humanity. I will on another occasion go into exactly how I came to the conclusion that she is the indignation holier than thou cunt that she is, but not now... I'll just piss myself off on this, "my Friday", before bed.

I also had the random thought today while taking the trash out... as the sun is just coming up, but not rising yet... The few clouds on the horizon, if you blur your vision a bit, look like pretty mountains in the distance.... Ha! Snap back to reality- no mountains just flat flat flat for as far as you can see. I miss mountains. A few months back I was on a trip to another village a few miles from here- I was panicking and on the cell with the hub. He said, "Well do you see any landmarks?" To which I not so calmly replied, "What?! What fucking landmarks?! There's nothing here. The only thing I can see is... The curvature of the earth!" He started laughing at me... and I realized I miss mountains, and valleys with well defined cities in them.

Anyways...just a few random thoughts. I should be around more soon, as the kids are out of school the end of this week- and them being around always adds excitement... insanity that needs an outlet.

Maybe it is just the exasperation talking- a crazy night busting ass, calming residents from dementia induced screaming, and shit explosions, call light bingo of the other residents not really sure of what they want.

Don't get me wrong, it's not that she is a hard ass, or just a bitch- it's just how she does absolutely everyfuckingthing she applies herself to from the moment she gets there until I leave. I have come to the conclusion that she has some serious undiagnosed psychiatric condition that make her the way she is. Compulsive, borderline obsessive. Why else would it take anyone 45 minutes to fill out a fucking form? Some people who seem compulsive aren't really- they are neat freaks, or big on attention to detail- but they still get their shit done. This woman gets so wrapped up in her shit that she gets tunnel vision, scatterbrained, and will write a report before she writes a report. No joke, she writes it out on a piece of paper, then copies it into the chart. Now if you have meds to give out, vitals to take, paper work to record on 15-20 people... isn't that a bit of a stretch? God forbid if something happens with one of the residents and she has to go check on them (keep them up for an hour to take their pulse?). Her shit is in a constant state of chaos. I think it must be awfully noisy inside her head- like a blind man tripping through a stack of empty cans on a tile floor.

Seriously, how can anyone who has been in nursing for 30+ years need to sit for 3 hours and look up medical terminology in a dictionary to fill out a chart? Keep in mind, in a nursing home, the conditions one sees on a day to day basis don't change that much- not like we are in the diagnostics wing of some exotic diseases hospital. It's a fucking nursing home... and these reports are on residents she has been working with for months if not years- what the fuck is she looking up?! Her report for a single shift (keep in mind it is a shift the resident has SLEPT through) takes up 75% of the page. By way of comparison, the day shift's notes take up 6 or 7 lines, and document no less information.

I am spending more and more time running around in the mornings trying to get her petty projects done ahead of her so she can do her fucking job. It's a goddamned good thing that I am good at what I do, so I have time to do it- but I shouldn't have to. It is driving me insane. She is obsessive, which is disturbing to the residents. She is a control freak, which is a pain to me, and I have noticed a touch of passive aggressive tendencies towards me and my co-workers when we get our shit done before she has a chance to nit-pick about them.

So, yeah. I love my job. Nights when Nurse Crazy isn't there are a fucking dream- even when those nights are harried and hectic with the residents climbing curtains and eating wallpaper. I can cope, I can deal, I can leave in the morning with a smile on my face.

BTW- no one cares in admin. They have had hundreds of night CNAs com and go through a revolving door of employment in the last 10 years that she has been there-dozens report her... and they won't do anything about shit that she does (or doesn't do), so talking to the big heads won't help. Best I can do is keep my private little mental notes of shit on a day to day basis, and over time, maybe I can compile a body of evidence the state can use to give her a nice vacation. In a quiet place. With the nice young men in clean white coats.

On the other hand, usually for his present I buy him electronics... which I invariably fuck up every. Single. Time. I buy what I think is a great thing, and find out that I could have had the one up model for less money, or it is not compatible with our shit, or it is not what he wanted at all and it will collect dust in the wrapper til the second coming of Christ. This year, I decided to try something different...

As food is something I can't dick up, and there is really nothing electronic he is lacking- I googled up food places that might send something no less than awesome. The Lobster Guy. For once, being married to a Masshole paid off. For the low price of $149.00 I got him two 2 pound lobsters, a pound of scallops, a pound of shrimp, half a pound of crab meat and two massive servings of clam chowder.That price included overnight shipping. Taking into account we could go to Red Lobster and spend $125, it was a hell of a deal. The little crawly bastards are in the kitchen at this very moment waiting for their execution in the boilin' pot.

With the extras, I was thinking of looking up a recipe for seafood stuffing, but going into uncharted territory, adventures in seafood cooking, as it were, I don;t want to risk dicking it up. I am sure no matter how easy the recipe looks, it may not come out like that restaurant we ate at on the cape. I can always go with what I know- scallops cooked with bacon, scampi and... I don;t know what to do with the crab- he doesn't eat crab cakes.... fuck it, I'll throw it into the "chowda".

I am off to go make a cake with GREEN whipped cream icing. Just because we are postponing the corned beef tradition, doesn't mean we are going to put off the yearly torture of K2 with the green extras.